Thursday, July 1, 2010

Day 7.

The Technical: Today I had an appointment at IRH. Dr A. is out of town so I saw Dr. S. It was a good appointment. They took another tube of blood, and I had an ultrasound. Dr. S said things are looking good for where we are in the cycle. The lining is at 10 and the lead follicle is at 15, with a bunch of 10s behind it. I'm not sure if this new protocol is going to yield more eggs... but we shall see. I'm not going to have enough Menopur, so I ordered 10 more vials today. Hope I'll have enough Ganirelix. We'd ordered very conservatively because I've had lots of leftovers in the past. I'm thinking I'll definitely be stimming longer this time. Dr. S. estimated middle of next week for retrieval. My next appointment is Sunday morning, on the holiday no less... my doctors are so dedicated and I so appreciate that. Jason and Michael may go with me, but I may send them to church instead.

The Emotional: I'm just plain old tired today. Feeling the edges of a headache... need to keep hydrating. Missing my friends from NOLA today. Just wish I had somebody to give me a big 'ole hug. I find a constant paradox in my mind... on one hand I so want people to know what's going on and then on the other I want to keep every bit of it private. I find that to be true of me in general though. Have you ever desired to be truly known by the people in your life, yet also desiring to be this "other"... to look like the ideal that you hope God is turning you into? Afraid to be seen, yet so needing people to see me for who I am and to love me for it. I am so blessed to have a husband that does know me inside out and he loves me for it. So does Jesus. That is enough, I know that. Yet, I feel like I'm supposed to have purpose, to bear witness to someone about something... Too big for me to wrestle with at this moment. Little Man is napping and the couch is beckoning me...

Until tomorrow.... I'm still hanging on... another day :)

3 comments:

  1. Yeah for the 15 and 10s!!! Hooray for a good lining too!!! My doctor told me the ganirelix protocol was more aggressive because it was to yield eggs that were all around the same size and maturity--more usable. I don't know that that was actually the case since they got 16 follicles and only 7 were mature, but it didn't matter because that whole 'it only takes one' really is true (even if aggravating to hear!!) I stimmed a LOT longer on the ganirelix and that worried me but every cycle is different and so is the protocol! So glad you feel confident with your doctors!!

    I totally get wanting to keep things private but wanting to be seen too...fine lines to walk. I'm glad you gave yourself some naptime!!!
    xoxoxo

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  2. Those ARE dedicated doctors! I hear you on the tired. Just tired. But you're right - there's always another day!

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  3. Missy- This was a beautiful posting. The second paragraph really touched me. Hang in there. You are a beautiful person, inside and out. Thinking about you and praying for you.

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